Out first ball
In a country town match, the batsman was out first ball. 'Not like last week,' said the wicket-keeper.
'No,' said the batsman. 'Last week I stayed in and got forty and when I got back all the beer was gone!'

Do it this way
The standard of batting in the local side was very low. Even at the net practice, they couldn't hit a thing. Finally, the captain rushed forward and grabbed the bat.
'Now bowl me some fast ones!' he yelled. Six fast balls came down in quick succession and the captain missed them all. Not to be put off he glared at the team and shouted,
'Now that's what you're all doing. Get in there and hit them!'

I need four runs
The batsman said to the bowler, 'Give me an easy one, will you? I bet a fellow in the crowd five pounds that I'd score four runs.'
The bowler did so and the batsman hit it to the boundary. Straight away, he walked for the pavilion.
'You're not out,' said the bowler, 'Where are you going?'
The batsman yelled back: 'I'm going to find the chap who bet me!'

How I do it ?
The batsman had a large opinion of his prowess.
He was approached by a club member who couldn't resist saying to him, 'You know, whenever I watch you bat, I always wonder...'
'I know, I know. How I do it.'
'No. Why you do it.'

Jokes on Bowling

Notice any difference
The bowler had a dreadful match which cost his side the game. All week long he practiced hard for the next game. During the following match, he said to the captain, 'Notice any difference?'
The captain looked at him thoughtfully. 'You've had your hair cut, haven't you?'

Good enough
In a local game. the visiting side had two fearsome fast bowlers. Everybody was terrified of them , none more so that the opening bat for the home team. He crept , shaking , to the crease and awaited the first ball. The bowler thundered up to the crease and hurled down a scorcher. The batsman waved his bat at it and it was fielded at mid-on. Immediately, he walked for the pavilion.
'Where are you going?' cried the bowler. 'He caught it on first bounce.'
'Looked good enough to me' replied the retreating batsman.

Old Rivals
Brown and Robinson were two old bowlers who were fierce rivals at cricket. One day, they decided to see who was the better player by having a game between themselves. Brown laboured for an hour to score twelve runs, but was bowled by the only straight ball he received. Both men were exhausted, and Robinson decided that he was too tired to bat and made for the pavilion, even though Brown had only to bowl at the empty wicket and break it to win.
As he lay slumped in the pavilion, an amused on looker strolled in and said, 'Congratulations.'
'What do you mean?' said Robinson.
'Haven't you heard?' said the spectator. 'Brown bowled thirteen wides!'

That was a maiden over
The demon bowler sent his thunderbolts whizzing past batsman and wicket-keeper for boundary byes from every ball of his opening over. The captain said, 'I think I'll rest you for a while.'
'You can't do that,' said the bowler. 'I've just bowled a maiden over.
'Women like that are a luxury I can't afford at the moment,' acidly replied the captain.

I'll open from this end
The village club was burdened with a big-headed skipper. Although a below average player, he considered himself the best in the side. They were up against tough opposition and as they walked out he said,
"Right. I'll open the bowling from the pavilion end."
"That's right, skipper," said the fast bowler. "You bowl 'em in - then I'll come on bowl 'em out."